Even though I was very young, I still remember the DAY with great clarity! We lived in a small village in Ohio where life was simple and easy. That is, until the DAY ! I remember the DAY dawned very overcast and a gray mist hung in the east! My father mentioned that morning that he thought the mist was a bad omen! How right he was!

When they came, they came from the east. They broke out of that mist like an angry swarm of bees and without any compassion, descended on my small village and life was never the same after that! This was the DAY that the Viking Traveling Salesmen came to town! They wore steel bow-ties, Gucci loafers and there were big black horns protruding from their shiny helmets. They were heavily armed with vacuum cleaners, soap products and encyclopedias.

We had no warning! Suddenly, they were upon us, pulling out order books and catalogs! Behind them were more Vikings armed with high interest rates! The men tried to resist but they were swept away as the Viking Traveling Salesmen went straight for the women! I remember my mother managed to hide my sister and me, in the closet, before she was overwhelmed. All we could do was listen to the screams as our world was shattered! It seemed as if the horror lasted for hours but then it became very quiet!

Finally, I was able to calm my sister and I crept out of the closet to see what had happened. There was destruction everywhere! My poor mother was in the corner of the room, broken and weeping uncontrollably! My father stood silently in the room's center, surrounded by vacuum cleaners, mops, bottles of soap and TWO complete stacks of encyclopedias! In his hand were those terrible bills of sale, laden with 90% interest.

My village never recovered from this barbaric attack! Many of the people grew despondent. Some abandoned their vacuums and encyclopedias, leaving to try to find a better life out west! My father was braver than most. He took a second and a third job to try and fix the damage, which had been done!

Me, I vowed to become a wizard and never allow this horror to happen to any peaceful village again! I swore to fight Viking cruelty and injustice wherever I found it! I still have nightmares about the DAY when the peace and serenity of my little village was shattered by that savage horde of Viking Traveling Salesmen!

 Animation by Barlekis the Wizard